Date Him First.

You should date someone who treats you terribly. Who treats you in a way that makes all of your friends wonder what the hell you’re thinking.

Someone who treats you like shit.

Find someone who never texts you back and always lets you initiate plans and never makes an effort. Find someone who makes you question their feelings because they have never just been honest with you. Find someone who uses you, who can never seem to be there when you actually need them. Be with someone who doesn’t care about your needs, your ambitions, your thoughts. Find someone who never asks about your family and disappoints you repeatedly and never says they’re sorry. Find someone who doesn’t care.

And then date them. Fall for them. Make excuses for them and justify why you’re the only one who gets them, who knows who they really are. Pretend like everything is fine. Convince yourself that you can change them. Believe that if you stick around, they will love you even more for always being there when they weren’t the person you needed them to be.

Love them even when you know you probably shouldn’t.

And then get your heartbroken. Be devastated by it, by them. Sit there, holding yourself together and wonder what you did wrong. Blame yourself for their issues, for their shortcomings.

Blame yourself for why they treated you like shit.

But then —
You’ll pick yourself up. You’ll move on. You’ll wake up one morning and even though the memories of them and how they treated you will still be there, it won’t hurt anymore.

You should date someone who treats you like shit.

Because when you date someone who treats you like shit, you’ll realize how you actually want to be treated.

You’ll go from being the person who shrugs off bad behavior, who excuses things, who settles, and you’ll turn into someone stronger. You’ll be better, more self-aware. You’ll turn into someone who knows what they want, and more importantly, what they deserve.

You should date someone who treats you like shit.

Because once you do, you’ll never let someone ever treat like anything less than amazing, ever again.

by @kendrasyrdal

A Plot Twist.

"Konsep kita mengenai jatuh cinta kadang mengaburkan fakta bahwa jatuh cinta nggak lagi sederhana."

- Tirta Prayudha, 2016.

Karena ternyata, butuh dua orang yang saling suka saja tidak cukup.

Ada kenangan kala itu yang masih ingin disimpan olehku,

dan masa lalu yang kembali menawarkan harapan padamu.

Just Don't.

Do not fall in love with me
For I will break your heart
Long before you realize

You were going to break mine

-Atticus

The Person I Met Too Soon.

So let's just stop the pattern.
I said.

So here I am.
I lied.

Sad truth is, I still look for you.
In every glance of weird things I saw today,
In every rooftops you promised me,
In every song you wanted me to hear, (fun fact tho, I stepped to a karaoke studio early this evening and the first song played was.....your Go Now you wanted me to hear, gosh, apakah Tuhan sedang mengajak bermain?)

I still look for you.

Second sad truth is,
you'll forever be the person I met too soon.
When the world was still much too big to find the one,
and my heart was still much too small to make room for love.

So if I ask,
"Why do we have to be in a rush?"
I dont even need your answer. I knew it already.

You are always in a rush.
Has always been, and will always be.

A Broken-hearted Girl Who Breaks Another Heart.

Adalah bahwa masalah hati,

kadang memang harus serumit ini.