Quick Check on Life.

Hi it's me again.

Resonating the title, just wanted to give you (and by you I mean my future self who will read this ridiculously) some updates on how life in Medan as the so-called UFLP (amen) has been treating this far:

1. I am on my 2nd last week in Medan: how both fast and slow life's been.
2. Oh I just had my last bookmonth presentation: yes I've been in 4 most nerve-wrecking meeting my whole life and I come out alive.
3. Did I mention it was a total flop? Well, to confirm: yes it was.
4. And the fact that I just lost my phone (and all the data) last Friday: just another day of clumsy Bethari.
5. I am about to go to Singapore this weekend: escape much, eh? nah gotta tell nobody :)
6. And there's this coronavirus outbreak happening in the world: and 4 is infected already in Singapore. wish me luck!

Now the silver linings:

1. My new phone will be coming tomorrow.
2. I am going back to Java in less than 2 weeks.
3. Gotta leave Medan with grateful heart because of the good people I met here (talking about the salesman & them peeps) and experience.
4. Jogja with PCMI Jatim at 15.
5. Baliiiiiiii with GtMenangishhhhh.
6. HOME. HOME. HOME. How I miss my home and mom and dad and sisters.
7. Meeting familiar places.

Now that I didn't get to have any traces left of my journey in Medan... may this post remind me of somehow my utter chaos happening here (in my mind and my surrounding).

May your week be good and your mental state be happy.

4 Kosan Kemudian.

AKU TUH CINTA BANGET SPOTIFY.

Terlepas apakah musik haram atau tidak.... aku gak mau munafik kalo musik sangat berpengaruh dalam hidupku. Music help me heal. It helps me deal with my own chaotic mind. Spotify is the cure I never knew I needed. Tau gak caraku menikmati musik sejak SMA-tahun kedua kuliah? Lihat Billboard & baca-baca artikel Grammy, buka YouTube, dengerin satu-satu, kalau suka maka aku akan cari videonya dan download video YouTube as MP3 pake online video downloader! Such effort! Tapi dengan adanya Spotify, dirty works kayak gitu udah bener-bener nggak ada lagi. Bisa bikin playlist, dengerin artis dari negara manapun, algoritmanya sesuai banget sama selera... JADI INTINYA PENGEN SEMBAH YG BIKIN SPOTIFY.

Hehe.

Tiap tahun Spotify juga rilis Wrapped gini, dan ternyata kita sudah bersama sejak 2016. Sejak itu nggak bisa bayangin hidup tanpa Spotify.

Malam ini aku memutuskan untuk dengerin Top Songs 2018.
Terus tiba-tiba mellow....

Lagu pertamanya adalah You and I dari Jon McLaughlin.
Masih inget banget kenapa lagu ini bisa jadi Top Songs, karena sempat beberapa hari ngulang lagu ini saking manis dan indahnya. Pas itu bahkan aplikasi Spotify aku lagi down terus aku belain streaming lewat web. Segitu cintanya aku sama Spotify. Tapi yang bikin mellow adalah:



Lagu itu aku dengerin sekitar bulan Agustus 2018, jaman-jaman ngerjain TA, di kosan Cisitu Baru. Lalu aku scrolling lagi dan menemukan lagu Million Dreams dari soundtrack The Greates Showman. Setelah aku ingat-ingat, film itu dirilis Januari 2018, dan aku nonstop dengerin playlist soundtrack itu selama 2 minggu.

JANUARI 2018.

Itu udah hampir 2 tahun lalu. Waktu itu aku masih tinggal di kosan Eyang. Lalu fast forward sekarang, aku di kosan KEDUA di Medan. Ketika aku dengerin lagu Million Dreams lagi, THE FEELS. Aku sudah mendengarkan lagu ini sejak kosan Eyang, lanjut kosan Cisitu Baru, lanjut kosan Jakarta, lanjut kosan pertama di Medan, dan sekarang udah kosan kedua di Medan.

Life...is...moving....before we've ever got the time to realize it.
Be present :)

How to: General Trade

My life in a nutshell:

I look very happy.....am I?

Happy is the prespective of its beholder. Oh well so diplomatic but hey again, human will NEVER be satisfied, am I right?

Hidupku cukup alhamdulillah. Cukup bahagia, cukup senang, cukup sedih, cukup stress. Segalanya dicukupkan HAHAHA. But seriously, I once prayed to have a job that requires me to TRAVEL a lot....now I do! I wander across Medan's tiniest streets and it's fun (and surprisingly, exhausting) at the same time! Tapi menurutku aku yah memulai perjalanan di Unilever dengan General Trade adalah kebijakan yang benar. GT gets you down to earth, literally.

So my life in a nutshell would be:

1. Kaos

2. Sepatu sendal

3. Rambut kuncir 

4. Less (and less) make up

5. Mobility (prolly will explain more about it)

But the best part is to really see the world as it is. Humans, colors, interactions. I love being on the road and love observing people, basically just how this whole thing works in harmony. And GT lets me do this. My new friends are the salesmen, the drivers, the helpers, and the outlet owners (well my mom is one). I ride motorcycles & trucks, and it's fun (meskipun gamau munafik naik mobil nyaman banget kak).

Tauga yg bikin ada stressnya apa? Hampir tiap hari sales curhat gaji dipotong. Belum lagi kalo driver nggak datang. Pengantaran telat. DISTRIBUTOR SUSAH DIATUR. Aduh. Udah. Biarkan aku menyimpan ini sendiri for myself.

Yg penting for now: mohon doakan aku bisa memperbaiki sistem disini dan lolos dr penempatan ini. Aamiin. Bismillah.

Hope to update more frequently soon!

Hi from Miles Away!

Hi, it's me again!

Hitting up blogspot again cos life starts to freak out....literally.

Ok so...it's me. In case you forgot that I existed. Lol.
The last time I write about work....was when I was about to start my FIRST JOB, which is Kantar Millward Brown. Gosh, I hate myself that I didn't write much (or didn't write at all) about my life there....cos it was happy life in MB!

At first it was lohe-leho moments. Everything was new. I have never worked full time previously and I just realized that I hated routine (I do miss college where every day is a surprise day and that my impulsivity got its best place). I just knew MB 2 weeks before I started tho, so I guess I had no expectation at all about prior to working there as well. Yet everything is exactly what and how I needed to learn, MB is exactly what and how it needed to be for my first job! Guess what?

I love marketing and this market research industry, or MB to be exact, is literally what I needed to:

1. Learn marketing at the very basic.
2. Start my professional world right.
3. Know my kind of ideal workplace.

Will never stop thanking God enough for putting me there almost 10 months.
Yas, I started at December 2018....and resigned per September 2019.

It broke my heart as well to know that I did resign from this company but then again.....

HERE. I. AM.
RIGHT HERE. RIGHT NOW.

In Medan for my first stint in one of the best (if not the best) MANAGEMENT TRAINEE PROGRAM OF ALL TIME.....for one of the best (if not the best) BIG FMCG COMPANY IN THE WORLD.....with one of the best (if not the best) OFFICE IN INDONESIA.

Wanna bet?

Here I am. At Unilever.
It's. Freakin'. UNILEVER.

Who would've thought that?
This has been my 5th (and last) attempt applying for MT program (after Ruangguru, Shopee, Danone, Gojek yet all failed) but when I thought I had enough trying and would just gave up already..... Allah gave me this. I still remember the days when I hardly pray for it and thought this was probably not for me. He is kind, He is good! :)

And here I am again.

Life starts to freak out again.
(SUMPAH RASANYA INI SEKARANG KAYAK LG NGERJAIN TA)

It's like you're carrying 1000 kgs on your shoulder but everyone's is expecting you to carry 1000 kgs more. Still not my burning point tho but the last time I felt this way....was when I started to do my tugas akhir. Within this short period of 3 months, I am expected to propose recommendation. This time, WITH A PROOF. With a hardly calculated result of what I did which eventually brings improvement.

Things get hard when you have a business partner who wants help but doesn't want to be helped.
And you have 2 mentors in which each has different opinion so you kinda lost about what you're going to do. And you have a manager whose words are swords and will cut you in pieces. And you have a family with its own problems who (unintendedly) takes up space in your mind as well. And you have no one to talk to about all this heart to heart without looking at you as their boss but rather as a 23-yo girl who's lost and needs help on her own too.


But everything I'm going through is preparing me for everything I asked for.
I literally am freaked out about this journey (even if I'm still on my 7th week) but really, I'm just gonna do the best I can and let God do the rest. I'll just need to make sure that what I gave (time, energy, heart) will justify my worth to deserve the best too.

Aamiin.
Lead me along this journey, ya Allah. Bismillahirrohmanirrohim.

The Storms of My Own.

I know it hurts.
Don't wanna get out of bed.
Much rather lay there instead.
Instead, you face what you fear –
The thought that no one is near.

 

It hurts.
You're living but don't feel alive.
No motivation or drive,
As you search for answers to why,
Oh, why.

Why me?

 
Won't somebody please,
Take my burdens away.
I can't do this today.

You've got to hold on.
Hold onto what you believe in.
Weather through every season.
Take it one day at a time.

 
You've got to hold on.
Don't put aside what you're feeling.
There is a process of healing.
You will be more than alright.
Take it one day at a time.

 

So overwhelming.
Everyone's counting on you.
Unaware you need help too.
But you don't say a word,
Too much work to be done.

No fun.

 
Go through the motions eyes closed.
'Cause you're always doing the most.
But the more that you do,
The more you seem to lose.

I have tried hard to fight against all my desires.
I would swallow my pride,
But I know I am called to live free and fulfilled.
No, it will not be easy,
But I will be still.

I will be still.
I will be still and know.

 

 

a heartbreakingly good song from Jessica Chung